The struggle is real…

Some days you have First World problems. And some days you suddenly realize you are having 1% First World problems and have become a caricature. Yes indeed… you are the ass getting the internal eye-rolls from the cashier and other customers.

Setting the stage. I’m at Whole Foods (eye roll #1) after Crossfit (eye roll #2):

  • Me to cashier as she rings up my organic asparagus: hey, are you folks still stocking lump charcoal? I see the briquets over there, but those are terrible.
  • Cashier: Um… those bags say “lump”
  • Me: yeah.. but they are briquets so you don’t get much heat. Plus they are from Kingsford so god knows what else is in those besides wood.
  • Cashier: (doing a great job not rolling her eyes visibly, she is clearly used to this nonsense) um… I could call the grocery department…
  • Me: no, no, I went there, they have the same junk. How do I provide feedback on this product change?
  • Cashier: (eye roll #3, she couldn’t hide this one)

I won’t continue as I managed to a) talk to someone who in theory is taking my feedback seriously, b) annoy several decent people at a grocery store, and c) become a character in Portlandia or maybe “Best in Show” (this is clearly not a busy bee! are you trying to be unhelpful!)

My only redemption was realizing at some point how silly this sounded, smiled, thanked all involved and wished them a good day and sincerely meant it. This humility should get me through the weekend at least.