Home from Zurich

Loads to get catch up on. First, exercise: pretty poor week but I expected that. I will basically do last week’s workouts this week although I have already missed Monday due to jet lag.Second, let me say that I have a deep and abiding hatred for a Swiss Air counter person, last name something like Dorchmuller, who absolutely screwed me yesterday. I asked for an exit row seat. She assured me I had one. When I finally boarded the plane not only was it not an exit row… it was a middle… with a bulkhead behind me… on a crowded flight. Lovely, just lovely. I don’t know why this ticket counter person hated me so much, but some day I vow revenge. I will find her and force her to spend 10 hours painfully cramped, looking forward to the rare respite of using the bathroom to get some space. I spent 2-3 hours standing in the back of the plane just to avoid that seat. I will find her, I will. Some day, somehow. Interesting fun fact about the Zurich airport by the way: the only counters there are all run by Swiss Air. So you go to check in for an SAS flight and logically enough you need to magically make the connection that SAS=Swiss Air. Long after I wandered around and finally found someone to ask I saw a tiny little sign with about 20 airline logos on it noting that essentially All Airlines = Swiss Air. So the next time some conspiracy nut rants about an evil pentavirate ruling the world, just note that it’s really The Queen, The Vatican, The Rothchilds, The Colonel (before his business went tits-up), and Swiss Air. Something to think about.Third, I hate SAS. I wanted to upgrade seats. I was willing to spend money to do so. But… you cannot apparently purchase ticket upgrades at the SAS counter in Zurich because, well, um… that is only handled at the gate in Copenhagen. Well that makes no sense and took me 30 minutes of going out through passport control in Zurich, hiking through baggage claim, and then finding this out. Well hell. So in Copenhagen I approach the transfer desk, because I was transferring, they had computers, and appeared to be a likely place to give them money. No, ha ha ha, my naivete! They don’t do that there. I would need to go to the boarding gate to get an upgrade. Sure, why not. So to the boarding gate… where I am told that I could, if I had miles, upgrade. But pay money? No, no, stupid passenger… tickets can only be purchased at the ticket counters, I should have done that in Zurich. Only the deep need to get the fuck out of Denmark allowed me the restraint not to simply go berserk at that point. Hell, given that berserk is a Scandinavian word maybe it would have been culturally called for and would have won me deep and lasting respect from those “people”. But no… I was beaten and I knew it. Thankfully the nice woman next to me was cool with me getting up and down throughout the flight. She probably preferred that to my bouts of thrashing around uncomfortably and muttering “I will get her” under my breath. Did I mention I love flying?”One last note for now about Switzerland and the Swiss. Other than the evil Dorchmuller (who in fact seemed pleasant) everyone was polite, kind, and very helpful. People were willing to tolerate my attempts to slaughter their language and then would kindly chat in English. Nice people as far as I could tell in my short stay. Pretty city. Nice place to visit. If only Swiss Air would do something about SAS.

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